Sunday, January 13, 2013

A Letter to Danny - January 13, 2013

Good Morning Honey:

Some religions teach that one shouldn't seek advice or solace from such things as astronomy, psychics, or mediums.  While I can understand that these means should not be a method to pattern or fashion your life, I feel that some people just have certain gifts that those of us who do not have cannot understand.  While I do not have those "gifts" I have never questioned that there are those who do...for after all, some of our children have the ability to see or hear things the rest of us do not.

Rainee and I went to a "medium" last Thursday.  I didn't go into it with skepticism, but I did go into it with caution.  I also know there are those in the world who would not hesitate to dupe me if I allow it.  With this healthy skepticism, I did not give her my name, or any other information that might be used to google me and therefore gain information.  I was cautious to say the least....and I was amazed!

  • She said you wanted to know about the Medicare Form I was reading.  She said you saw me reading it in the kitchen.  The night before, I had arrived home and opened my mail.  One of the envelopes contained a Medicare Form that I needed to fill out and return.  I sat at the kitchen counter, filled it out and put it in the envelope to mail the next day.  No one knew about that form except me...and you.
  • She asked if I had taken my wedding and engagement rings out of a box and then put them back again.  She said you wanted me to know it was alright to put them away.  (although I still wear a substitute wedding ring.)  A few days before, I was cleaning my room and picked up my ring box and took out the rings you had given me 48 years ago.  I felt bad that I didn't have the money to get the diamond replaced.  I slipped it on my finger and then took it back off and put it in its box.
  • She said she recognized my wearing your jacket.  The night before as I got ready for bed, I was missing you so.  I went to my closet and took out your flannel jacket (the one I have not washed since you wore it last.)  I slipped it on and crawled into bed.
  • She said you were asking "What's the deal with the earrings" and then added that you liked the new look.  Last summer Lola and I got our ears pierced together.  I had never worn earrings before (except for a brief stint when I tried getting them pierced back in the 1990's only to have them become infected.)  Since last summer I have loved wearing earrings.  Also, I have changed the color of my hair.  I have so often wondered if you would like the "new me" as you had such a problem with me cutting my hair that hung almost to my knees back in 2005.  It is so like you to notice the changes I have made.
  • She kissed her fingers and asked me what that meant.  I have your picture sitting on my dresser and each night I kiss my finger and place it on your face.  She said you acknowledged the kisses I gave you.
  • She asked me if I had any questions I wanted answered by you and I told her yes.  Honey it has bothered me so much that I wasn't with you when you died; that I had been with you through so much in our lives, but when you needed me most, I wasn't there.  So I told her I wanted to know if I should have been with you at that time.  You responded with "If you would have been there, I wouldn't have been able to leave you."  I know now, that in order for you to leave this life, I needed to be away from you.  It once again reinforced the love that we have for each other. 
  • I asked if I needed to follow any religious dictates in order to be with you again when I leave this earth, because if I did, I would do the in a heartbeat.  She said you answered with a resounding "NO!" 
  • She told me that you read my letters.
  • She said you were met on the otherside by your Dad and a black and white dog.  The kind of dog that is used to herd cattle.  Of course, that would have been Rodeo.
  • She ended with your telling me that you love, love, love me.
There were so many other things that were said that I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt could have only come from your lips. 

I left feeling so much better.  I know that you are with me everyday.  I know that you know how much I love and miss you and how much one day, I want to be with you again.  So my darling, I will continue to talk and sing to you when I go for a ride in my car.  I will continue to kiss your picture every night.  I will wear your flannel jacket when I want to feel your arms around me.  I will know that you are only a breath away.  And I will look forward to receiving the white feathers you told me to look for.

I love you Honey.

Far Beyond the 12th of Never


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